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Benly
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Here's my pride and joy; named the Black Pig because it's black, and it's a pig. It has a plastic toy-pig Hammerited to the front mudguard. Rumours of Cap'n Pugwash associations are hereby refuted, (although I do know someone named Pugsley, and he's a pig too.)
Packed with 194cc of pure muscle (it does 0-60 !!!), it sips unleaded at 87 mpg. and with its Yamaha XS850 tank, has a 64% greater fuel-capacity, and can do up to 420 miles between fill-ups. A tank that size meant that it had to become a single-seater, and so the seat was made out of a slab of mahogany, some foam, vinyl and a staple-gun; the tank and seat are held on to the frame with 1" pre-drilled steel strapping, making for a very bouncy ride ! A trip to the breakers (Merlin's, of Penge) provided rear shocks, front mudguard and chain-guard. A GPz-style bikini fairing was added (which housed a radar-detector for a while [why ?]) and a CM exhaust was persuaded into place with lots of Gun-Gum and 'zorst-bandages. The Black Pig was treated to a new wiring loom, chain & sprockets, cables, pattern rear mudguard, Metzeler tyres and three cans of Hammerite Black paint. The bike was stripped down to its individual components, sprayed, then re-assembled with the aid of a tatty Haynes manual in my bedroom. All identifying marks and logos were removed to heighten the sense of mystery. No engine-work was needed, other than to check the clearances. It starts first time with either the starter motor or two prods on the kick-start, without choke (unless it's brass monkeys outside). A diddy-wee K&N air filter replaces the airbox, and some donated bars, grips and end-plugs grace the front end, providing a very comfy sit-up'n'beg riding position. It has more steering-lock than any other bike I've seen, which helps me lose Despatch Riders ( of which I was one once ) from my single rear-view mirror. I often fold the mirror inwards to squeeze me through that narrow gap between buses and lorries, and yes, I do have huge plums ! Incidentally, I was dubbed Rubber Chicken after the one which found itself cargo-netted across my old XS850's tank, and I have, on one occasion, used it in anger against a pea-headed, myopic Volvo driver who pulled out in front of me with a caravan in tow. Regards, Paul (Rubber Chicken) Walford candle.man@virgin.net back to Reader's Rides |
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